SMS jokes - 1

A lesson frm Grammer:
"The past will always be simple. The Future will always be Perfect & the Present will always be Tensed..!" :

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Value of a true friend:
when u like 2 walk in the rain, i'll b there with an umbrella...
just 2 prevent SOIL EROSION from ur HEAD...

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Happy news!
The world will not end in 2012 bcoz just now i saw a tomato ketchup bottle which expires in

2013....!
Smile plz...
:)

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A really smart statement!..
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"I may not always love all the girls who loved me....
But i surely do respect n appreciate their choice....!!"

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Sucide tips 4 boys:-
1-Tk big rope tie it around ur neck & Hang ur self...
2-Slow deth; tk a small rope tie it on a girl"s neck n marry.

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DEFINITION OF LAZINESS-
" It is the art of taking rest before getting tired ":

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For The First Time In India,I Am Introducing A "3D" Msg In Ur Mobile.
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"D D D"

Thank u-thank u,
no publicity please.

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Briteesh rooled avar kantry phor meni ears, de destroid avar kalchar,so wot?
Let as destroi dher langvage 'ingleeis' lyke dis. Send eat tu aal yor phrends

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Wonderful saying:Marriages may be made in "heaven".But..The maintainance charges have to be paid on "Earth"!

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Tiger & Tigress were resting under a tree. Suddenly a deer passed very fast.
Tigress could not make out & asked,"What was that?"
Tiger smiled & said, FAST FOOD!

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Whenever an intelligent man makes any important decision, he closes his eyes, thinks a lot, listens to his heart, uses his head & finally does wat his wife says

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The Best Prank Call Ever:

"Hello KFC?"
- " Yes, How can I help you sir?"
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" I want MACDONALD'S number!!! :-P

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We need 3 things in lyf..

-LOVE to make us weak..
-ALCOHOL to make us strong..
n
-FRIENDS to pick us up wen both these things make us hit the floor..
;-)

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Boy to girl Before Exam:
Hey All The Best,
Girl Also Told The Same.

But Girl Scored 80 Marks And Boy Failed.

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Moral: Only Boys Wish With True Heart. :-)

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Height of my bad luck!
I want to kiss the most attractive "person" in the world but. . .
oh!
My lips can't touch My Cheeks...

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If You Want To Remove Your Wrinkles, Pimples, Face Marks & The Signs Of Skin Aging Try...
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ADOBE PHOTOSHOP ;->

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A man in temple left a notice,


"Don't steal my shoes,-boxing champion"



when he returns,he sees shoes missing, with a notice,



"Don't try to catch me,-Olympic champion".

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ATTITUDE DURING EXAMS:

They gave me the questions which i don't know,So i wrote answers which they don't know.
Tit for Tat dis is called ATTITUDE.

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HEIGHT of COOLNES: Finishing the paper, coming out of the exam hall, having a Cold Drink & asking ur friend: "Dude, which paper was it?

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sumtimes ....there r no words 2 describe how much we feel bout some ppl ....
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THANK GOD, HE GAVE US D MIDDLE FINGER....!!! :P

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Guy: You Look Like My Wife..
Girl(surprisingly): Whats Ur wife name?
Guy: I am not yet married..!

Moral : Xpress Your Ideas Smartly..!

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Difference between ignorance and self control

When u c d mirror, u don't laugh thatz IGNORANCE

When i look at u,i also dont laugh thatz
SELF CONTROL

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Is phone acidic or basic in nature ?
acidic !
why ?
because it has a Ph value of 1
phone = ph one - pH 1
now plz go and hit ur head :D

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Auto driver turns at NO ENTRY.
Traffic police sees him but does not stop him.
Why?
PJ of the Millenium:
bcoz Auto driver was WALKING.

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There are Two Words in a Person's Life
That Will Open Many Doors for Him.

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Push and Pull. :-)

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Best slogan seen on a famous beauty parlour...

"Dont whistle at d girl going out from here...

.....she might be ur grandmother...!!

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Every woman needs a husband Bcoz there are a number of things that go wrong For everything u cannot blame God or the Government

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Billboard On The Side Of The Road:


"Keep Your Eyes On The Road

And Stop Reading These Boards." :-)

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A ThermoMeter is n0t the 0nly thing
that gets a “DEGREE” without having a “BRAIN”…! :p

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What is it that RAM can do but RAVAN cant?
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A: Wear a T-SHIRT.

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What is it that RAVAN can do but RAM cant?
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A: Group discussion when he is alone.