-She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
-Thank God I'm an atheist.
-The Americans will always do the right thing . . . After they've exhausted all the alternatives.
-They misunderestimated me.
-When I'm good, I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.
-Tobacco kills its best customers..
-Alchohol kills slowy.........so wat who's in a hurry...??
-A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
-Airplanes may kill you, but they ain't likely to hurt you.
-Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
-Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
-Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day
-Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
-When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not
screaming, like the passengers in his car
-I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-I remmember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
-People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world
-I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
-If you love your job, you haven't worked a day in your life
No comments:
Post a Comment